Week 5: Complications Inside and Outside My Head

You would think that a week in which I had to get 7 stitches in my forehead would be an eventful week, right? Surprisingly enough the last 5 or 6 days have probably been the least abnormal since I've been here. I have gone through a lot of inner struggle of thought, and I've seen even further the purpose and direction of the ministries in this church. But maybe it's been the 5 straight days of torrential rain that have kept the regular abnormalities at bay.

I suppose I should first tell the story of the gash in my head - unfortunately it's not a very exciting one. As my missionary friends have said to me, it's just too bad I can't go home and say I got that scar from an elephant tusk or saving a Thai girl from being hit by a motorcycle! Unfortunately, I have seven stitches in my head right now mostly because I'm too tall for Thailand. During one of our torrential downpours I was walking back to the church from lunch and was wearing my nice, new rain jacket. With my hood up I don't have much peripheral vision, and I basically walked right into an air conditioning unit! I didn't think anything was wrong at first, until I decided to rub the spot where I had hit my head and pulled my hand away to find quite a bit of blood on it. A member of our Thai staff, Phi Chai, took me by taxi to the hospital and for about $110 I was able to get a Tetanus, the follow-up medicine, and the nurse and surgeon care necessary for the stitches. Also unfortunately, there wasn't even anything very unique about Thai hospitals. Great service, normal amenities, and the same hospital smell. Maybe the only unique thing was the cart of unlabeled drinks that were set out for anyone to take. Overall, not too bad I guess.

Thankfully colliding with an AC unit didn't mess with the inside of my head - as far as I can tell. But it has left my mind free to think and struggle through a lot concerning the call of God upon my life. As I continue serving here, I continue to feel much confusion over my place in missions. I've felt for years now that my life ought to be given somewhere among the unbelieving nations of the world, where there is little to no Christian witness. But, being here makes the reality of cross-cultural ministry much stronger, and I am struggling through where the Lord's call upon me is. I have wondered if the gifts God has given me are most wisely used cross-culturally. Not to mention I wonder what my gifts even are! I know that I love to teach the Bible, I love to preach God's Word, and to encourage Christians to gain a deeper understanding of truth. But am I called and equipped to do that in another language, another culture? Then I wonder if my heart really is to be in a place like Thailand. I wonder if I ought to go elsewhere and see if my heart lies there, instead. But I wonder if those desires are even important in considering where there is need and where God is calling me to (my inclination is to say that the desires God gives us are good and often are indicative of where He's calling us). At the end of the day (actually, it usually happens at the beginning for me) I am comforted by this truth: God knows. He will guide me as He desires, and I can rest in that, waiting on Him.

Last night I taught an adult English class, and got to see one of the essential ministries at New Community Fellowship. I had the class read a children's version of the story of the Prodigal Son. Lots of good words and concepts to discuss in English, and I think they learned quite a bit from that. Then I asked them what they thought of it. It was at this point that I saw the wisdom in what the church has recently been doing: there are enough Thai Christians in the church that want to learn English that they've tried to have at least one Christian in each English class. Then, when discussions arise, there is the opportunity for those believers to share their faith and their hearts with the others in the class. It was beautiful to see these four people interacting and sharing life together. Through these English classes, and things like the camp that we're having next month, our church members are able to build relationships with these people, love them, encourage them, and simply live life with them. At unique times like last night, we may even get to speak the truth of Jesus Christ to them.

I realized that last week I totally forgot the portion of the blog that tells you about the new things I've experienced. I'm so sorry, because I know that's what most people really read this for anyway! :) So, in the last two weeks, I ate a literal ice cream sandwich (ice cream scooped into a bun - really a great idea), drank cantaloupe flavored milk, ate fried bread filled with coconut, accidentally bought and tried to use lotion as body wash since I couldn't read the label, ate an entire shrimp since they don't peel the tails for you, witnessed a monk receiving alms from two families, tried the delicious "queen of the fruits" known as mangosteen, ate butterfish, showered next to open fish containers (really there was just a wall about waist-high extended into the bathroom that had water and fish in it) and brushed my teeth with that water, and ran and came in second in a 3K race that I bought shoes and registered for less than two hours before the race.

So, I continue to see my lack of use and many shortcomings. But in those same places I just realize how essential God's work is; I have no way of employing evanglism methods, church-growing techniques, personality strengths, etc. It's just God's Spirit moving if anything of worth happens. I hope that in seeing all that's going on, the Lord continues to bring believers to realizing the importance of their hearts in prayer before Him. Here are things that I'm aware of us needing prayer in:
-My Growth. As you've seen, I am very confused about what this experience means in my calling. I'm also still discovering how to serve this church and people most faithfully.
-English Camp/Classes. July 13-14 we have English camp for any students or people interested in English. The camps are usually some of the most effective times to build relationships amongst the English students. As I mentioned, I see how important these classes are, and there are many throughout the week offered by our church.
-Campus Ministries. School is in the process of starting now, and we have our first UCF club meeting this Sunday. Pray also that we would have unity with the other campus ministry, Youth With A Mission (YWAM).
-The Church Body. One of our members' father died this week, and it has caused grief and bitterness in that family. That Christian needs grace to live faithfully and know God's hope. Our staff needs grace to love that family deeply. Also, as school starts back up, more people will be coming to church - most likely - and we continue to desire growth in numbers and maturity.

Thank you for praying, and for caring for me. While I am glad for this experience, and believe that God is teaching me in many ways, my heart often returns to the States and my family in Christ there. May the Lord continue keeping us in His rest.